Don’t Breathe (2016)

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Don’t Breathe = the People Under the Stairs meets a backwards the Strangers set in the house of Napoleon Dynamite.

In other words, utter shit.

Don’t Breathe is a movie with no moral compass. We start by following three thieves as they burglarize houses. In bombed out Detroit. (Okay, I’m assuming it’s Detroit just from the location shots.) Detroit has enough problems already, the last thing we need to be watching is three privileged white kids exploit the area.

So for the first 1/3 of the movie we have no likable characters. They’re thieves stealing from a blind veteran who received a sizable payout when his only daughter was killed by a rich girl. So they’re stealing from a grieving veteran. So when the first thief gets shot, you’re happy. They were heartless pricks before, and now they’ve sunk lower.

But those three are the only characters we know, and Sony’s obviously not going to leave us rooting for the antagonist. So we eventually find out that this blind vet has the girl who killed his daughter chained up in his basement. And he’s impregnated her to replace his daughter. You know, something SO over the top that we have to hate him.

Which leaves us rooting for no one. Which I guess puts it on the short list for scariest film seen this season. Also on the short list for “most blatant misuse of foreshadowing” this year.

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