저는 새로운 의사와 간호사가 만나고 있어요

Translation: Meeting a new doctor and nurse.

Long story short, a few weeks ago I started playing soccer. I started playing soccer despite never having played soccer before in my life. (Okay, we would play a couple times every year in middle school, but no one counts that. Especially since it amounted to me walking around talking to my friends and then pretending to run after the ball if coach looked our way.) Needless to say. playing soccer requires more skill then I currently possess.

So by week two I had managed to sprain two ankles, tweak two knees, and completely shatter a toenail. (Apparently when you see professional soccer players, or even amateur ones, launch the ball, they’re using the top part of their foot. They’re NOT hitting the ball straight on with their toe.

img_0047

Do it once and you’ll immediately know why. Do it twice and you’ll be limping your way through the next two games before showing your handiwork to your doctor the following Monday. Who, in turn, will send you to a different doctor so that someone else can tear the old, broken toenail off and get rid of all the dried blood from under it.

Only the foot doctor won’t tear off the old nail. He’ll instead warn you that your soccer playing days are (for now at least) over before taking out the world’s tiniest screwdriver and drilling two holes through the toenail. Then squeezing the blood out.

Seriously, it looks like I was attacked by Bunnicula while I was sleeping.

That said, the one win from this was being able to use some (understanably) broken Korean in the wild, and being understood while doing so. After the 2nd visit (and squeezing), I came to the most difficult part – figuring out how to pay my bills when I don’t speak their language, and they don’t speak mine. (Unfortunately the nurse who helped me last week was not here today.)

Turns out that after a lot of frustrating waiting (it is a hospital after all), you’ll stumble onto  the correct payment desk (I have no clue what the first lady I talked to was doing, or why she directed to sit down rather than to the payment lady who was literally sitting next to her. I mustered up all I had learned of Korean, and imparted it one glorious senten… okay, statement:

제 천구서를 내고 싶어요 (I’d like to pay my bill). Or, as I actually said it, “천구서 내고 싶어요.” Which would be a really janky way of saying the previous. Luckily for me, as my Korean teacher told me just a few days ago, my ability to speak in Korean is now capable of sounding understandable but wrong. Like a true non-native speaker bumbling their way through hundreds and thousands of years of established grammatical rules.

So I’m counting this as a win, even if I did spend way too long waiting for something to happen rather than using my (limited) skills to do it myself.

 

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